Wow So ALOT Has Happened...

Alot has happened since I last posted.
I got a job.
It became 2012!!! Happy New Year!!! I still have the same New Year Resolutions as last year.
I went to a discharge course.
I started Course Nativ.
One roommate finished the army so we got a new one.
And I have been thinking nonstop about what to do with my future.
I also worked myself sick through Passover.

Lets see, where shall I start...
I got a job at the newest store in one of the Tel Aviv Malls. That's right. Forever 21 made its way to Israel! I have to say a full time job plus the army is VERY difficult.
I got the job during my what was supposed to be a vacation. Clearly I have a problem with sitting and relaxing. I really need to learn how to relax.
I spent my new year working. Everyday before that and every day after that.
I really hated on of the people in my building since I left because there was nothing I could do. I felt it was better to save myself from a GIANT and possibly violent break down. Seriously, who gives one girl an entire unit's Avtash? Now let me be the first to say I LOVE avtash but I am not about to do 2 months of day in day out guard duty for a bunch of baby's who don't want to miss one night of drinking, partying, and playing video games. No. Not me. I refused to be their fall girl anymore. I even told my commander that if she agreed with letting me go I wouldn't be showing up. I stayed quiet for too long and it back fired. I did what I was told and instead of getting respect in being a good soldier I got walked on so lazy pieces of shit could do what they want. SOOOOO done with them. So happy about it too.
Anyone who wants to join the army and is reading this- take my advice: CLOSED BASE!
Being on a closed base is honestly the best experience you can have. Being on an open base is like being stuck in an extra few years of school where you have no room for growing mentally and it just holds you back. You get stir crazy and it sucks.

End of February...
Well first off in the beginning of February I started Course Nativ. Yes it is fun...kind of.
Secondly, during the end of February we had a roommate situation.
One of our roommates finished the army and we had about 2 weeks to find a replacement.
It was very stressful. But in the end it worked out. We got a replacement. With that being said- it got me thinking. What do I want to do after the army? Do I want to leave right away? Do I want to stay? Do I want to travel? Should I just pay off the end of my contract? Should I find a replacement? It is all so very confusing.
Going back to America? I can't go back to how it was? Living with my mom? I just spent the past 3 years living by myself paying my own bills and making my own food. Isn't that like a step backward? How can I restart in America if I just went back steps?

Anyhow this very confusing and stressful problem piled onto work and the army took its toll and clobbered me. A little before Passover I started to get sick. I went to the doctor. She being the stupid piece of shit she is told me to see her after vacation even though I needed her immediately since the swolen glands in my neck hurt then and not 2 weeks from then.
I stupidly went to the Passover Sedar for Lone Soldiers. The Ramat Cal Benny Gantz AND thats right AND The Prime Minister Benyamin Netenyahu were there! I was lucky enough to see them. But aside from that I was just so dead. I felt horrible. I couldn't even finish the sedar. I couldn't eat at all. It just hurt so bad. I was cold and hot and just wanted to curl up in my blankets and sleep. My head was pounding. I spent the weekend in my bed. I missed everything. It was a horrible idea for me to go. After the sedar I went to the bikor rofe. Have I ever explained how much I hate them?
I got there at 10pm and didn't leave till 1am for them to tell me to drink water and take an advil............. ..... like.... where the hell did you get your medical degree from? bitch are you stupid? you are a doctor. you see I cant open my mouth that much or move my head dont fuckin give me advil! give me antibiotics! My GLANDS ARE SWOLAN YOU BLIND BAT! Advil is not gonna help. If it didn't help for the past week it sure aint gon help now! Jus sayin. The IDF needs new doctors.
So for my ENTIRE Passover break which ends tomorrow morning when I return to base I have been barely able to eat except for a few jello's and little sips of water. Thank you doctors for your wonderful doctor help and brains. I missed a week of work. You know vacations are fun if you can relax not actually be sick. That's not fun. So I get to go to base tomorrow and hopefully I get to see a doctor.

That's the end of my little rant. lol Everything from December 21,2011 to today April 14,2012 in a nutshell.
OH AND on Feb 15,2011 I was officially promoted to Sergeant (Samal) but of course thanks to Course Nativ I STILL cant put it on my uniform...I so went behind their backs and put it on

The Kaban. FINALLY!

So we left off with Avtash in May. Long time I know. But now I have many things for you to read. I came home from Avtash May 31st. I was supposed to go to the dentist but they canceled on me. So I ended up going on my birthday.

During Avtash I had a meeting with the kaban who said we had to reschedule. I got a meeting with the kaban that thursday since coming back from guard duty. I was lucky I had an appointment really early. I get to the building and sign in saying Im here for the kaban and they tell me to sit and wait. After about an hour of waiting they tell me that my specific kaban wont be coming in today. I showed them that I had an email from her saying I had a meeting but that did nothing. She wasn't coming in at all. Needless to say I was pissed. I have been doing everything this woman says. I went and did the impossible. I talked my way into an interview with the Unit Commander and Lieutenant Colonel and got his permission. Then I somehow managed to switch jobs and he became my commander. THEN I up and left for a TWO WEEK avtash that most people said was too long and that there had to be some mistake. I showed up to every meeting. Wrote all emails to the kaban showing my hebrew level. I did everything I could. When I did see her, I even spoke to her in hebrew. I wanted her to see, to hear how much I wanted to become an officer. And she couldn't even show up for one 20 minute meeting. How am I supposed to react in this situation? I was told that a kahas means Im an angry person. Not once did I lose my cool. I had fun at avtash where in 30 seconds of being on base, I saw girls start crying their eyes out because they had to sleep on base for 1 NIGHT. A NIGHT! Here I am already a week at Juara and I love the people there and they love me. Needless to say I was pissed. Im pouring my heart and soul into this and they don't care. I kept thinking something was wrong with me. That maybe I do get mad easily because it annoys me when people walk slow or dont use common sense or logic. Or sometimes when I play a video game I yell at it when I'm losing. Did this make me a bad person? Am I a bad person because I hate my roommate's best friend? Am I an angry person for getting disgusted with every guy that comes up to me telling me how beautiful and sexy I am and how I should be his girlfriend? You know, I dont think so. I think Im normal. I think I come from New York. I dont think that girls from New York like when a boy come up and ask to sleep with them. I dont think anyone likes that. So no. Nothing is wrong with me. Im fine. If anything I control my temper then most officers I see. I do better in situations then most people because I keep my cool. I can control my temper. I proved it over and over. I deserve everything Im working for.

I got back from the kabans building and went to my office. I told my commander who called the kaban and I sent her an email. She sent me a message and rescheduled a date. I felt better. I wasn't going to let this slip through my fingers. A few days later I get an email from her and she asked to reschedule again. I did. It was for the 12th. Before the 12th, Karin called the kaban where she told me some very valuable information that the kaban refused to tell me. She didn't think I was serious about this. But finally I got 2 ways of beating the kahas. Every 3 months I do 1 week of avtash and a meeting until I no longer have a kahas, or I can get a meeting with the head kaban and ask for it to be canceled. The first one takes well over a year to do and the second one is nearly impossible.

My birthday came and I got a tooth pulled and I got a week to not be at base. Sunday came. My meeting with the kaban scheduled for 830 am. I got there at 8 am knocked on her door and let her know I was there, she was with someone. Finally at around 1030 I get to see her. We talk. I told her that being on an open base was way harder and more stressful then being on an open base. We talked about my ENTIRE file. It hurt to know that things in my file weren't true. The kaban from Michve Alon failed to write things she said to me, things she asked me to do, and she didn't write things I said. Since when did I become a rebellious teenager? When was this even said? Sure I died my hair so many colors and smoked Marijuana, but I challenge you to find one person in Kings Park who hasn't even tried it or been in the same room as someone smoking it. I didn't deny and said I smoked it. I then asked if she wrote about telling me I needed to take some "all natural" pills to help calm me down. It was no where in my file. I was devastated. My file was false. No wonder why I had a kahas. Someone screwed with my file. Someone destroyed my not even started army career. I told the kaban everything. Everything about my family life and life in Israel. She then explained how I could get rid of the kahas. She requested a meeting with the head kaban to completely cancel out the kahas and told me that I need a new kaban since she was moving to a new area and job. After this meeting I went to the dentist and got another tooth pulled. I was soo late but a girl passed out so all the appointments were pushed back. After a half hour of waiting I got my tooth pulled and 3 days of no army but one intense head ache that I didn't get last time.

When I came back from my sick leave things were better. I was still wondering what was going on with my file. That thursday at the very end of the day, when I was cleaning with Steven, that we needed to discuss me becoming an officer. He told me he received a phone call from the head kaban. I said "Okay, when's my meeting?" My commander smiled at me and said I didn't need one because I don't have a kahas. I was in shock. I still to this day dont believe it. The only thing I could say was how impossible that was because I needed the meeting. He said I didn't and that wed talk about it. Well we still need to talk about it. I guess I'll talk about it with him the week I return from my trip in New York.